What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Make Nazis afraid again!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

My blog is new. I need 10 article posts for my blog. How much should I pay for it?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

What should I do if a girl whom I love asks me to be her friend?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Why is that Hag Hillary Clinton so quiet these days? She is the dog that isn't barking

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Why do gun lovers think their right to own a weapon supercedes everyone else's right to be safe and not be shot?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

How do I become mentally strong?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

How does growing up in chaos affect a child as they become an adult?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

What is so great about Jiraiya?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Why is my older sister so mean to me as if I was her enemy?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why do men like to have sex with a woman's ass?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

TEXT:

Do you even realise that NASA could've hid or bury every single piece of evidence for a flat-earth and exaggerate their evidence? Have you ever question materialist scientific narratives?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why does the God of the Bible condemn homosexual acts?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!